Drawing Comfort Tip #6 - Supporting your child to experience big feelings
Children don't always have the words, confidence or emotional skills to explain what's happening inside them.
Here's a simple, practical approach to support your child's emotional development:
NOTICE – NAME – ACCEPT – CHOOSE
1. NOTICE
Help your child notice what's happening.
"Your fists are clenched and your voice is getting louder."
"You've gone very quiet."
"I can see you've got tears in your eyes."
2. NAME
Help them put a word to the feeling.
"I wonder if you're feeling angry?"
"Could that be worry?"
"You seem really disappointed."
Over time, children become better at recognising these feelings for themselves.
3. ACCEPT
Let them know the feeling itself is okay.
"It's okay to feel angry."
"It's understandable to feel worried."
"You really wanted that to happen, so it makes sense that you're disappointed."
This doesn't mean allowing unsafe or hurtful behaviour.
All feelings are welcome. Not all behaviours are.
4. CHOOSE
Once your child is more settled, help them think about what they can do next.
"What might help your body calm down?"
"Would you like a cuddle or some space?"
"Do you want to draw it, talk about it or go outside for a few minutes?"
"What could we do differently next time?"
This final step is about building the skills your child will eventually be able to use independently.
And remember: connection comes before correction
When a child is overwhelmed, they may not be able to listen to explanations or think logically about their behaviour. In those moments, connection usually needs to come first.
Get alongside them. Lower your voice. Give them space if they need it. Let them know you're there.
You might simply say:
"You're having a really hard time right now. I'm here. We'll work it out when you're ready."
The reflecting and learning can come later.
Curious about whether your child needs additional support?
If you're worried about your child, you don't have to work it all out on your own.
The first step is simply having a conversation.
Book a free consultation and we'll talk about what's been happening, answer your questions and decide together whether Drawing Comfort is the right support for your family.
